I'm afraid he is, my friend! Not all narcissists are monsters! Only one kind out of SEVEN is what we can qualify as a monster: completely disconnected from the conscience; hence, unable to feel empathy or remorse. It is the "Malignant narcissist" or what experts like to call the "Sadistic psychopath".

For all the 6 other kinds, inflicting harm to others is not the main goal. It's merely a side effect they have no problem to trigger!

This piece might, hopefully, enlighten you a bit when it comes to the different categories:

https://myriambensalem.medium.com/shall-we-talk-a-bit-more-about-psychological-abuse-63c91f82f8d