From Self-Reflection To Self-Insight
It Is About Switching From a Why to a How-question!
Switching from a Why to a What question is a well-known trick to move from self-reflection to self-insight. It is an effective way to cultivate our self-awareness.
According to the organizational & researcher Tasha Eurich:
Why-questions can draw us to our limitations; What-questions help us see our potential. Why-questions stir up negative emotions; What-questions keep us curious. Why-questions trap us in our past; What-questions help us create a better future. In addition to helping us gain insight, asking what instead of why can be used to help us better understand and manage our emotions.
What I noticed is that each time I was asking myself a Why-question, I was giving my power and scripting myself in a victim mentality. I was giving control to my unhealthy ego full of anger, criticism, doubt, and fear.
The shift might never be fully reachable, automatically, since the why-question is the natural one — or it would, at least, need a considerable amount of time and practice.
We can diminish the gap between the why-question and the what-question, though. It is already an achievement!
Only by gradually destroying our limiting beliefs about ourselves & the world, owning our emotions, and learning to regulate them, would we be able to:
- Experience the magic of the inner-peace,
- Start developing our Emotional Intelligence, since we also become aware all human “beings” — Notice I said beings, not doings — are sharing the same core needs and insecurities, leading us to become compassionate towards others,
- Acquire self-confidence and strength through knowing we were able to fight our “own” thoughts and bear with the accompanying pain,
- Open our world to limitless opportunities for building healthy relationships and giving back to the world.
With love, Myriam
